Mops, Magic and Mayhem
by Lenle.G
Summary: Crack Fic, Oneshot. Merlin is running short on time, so clears up the mess he made with magic, but then Arthur walks in... and was that a unicorn? Was fun to write, and it made me laugh at least! Reviews would be wonderful please! :D xxx


**A.N: Oky, so I 'borrowed' this whole idea off my dear friend GeorgiPorgiPuddingandPie, so all credit for the idea goes to her, I just wanted to have a play with it *insert Morgana-worthy smirk here*. It was, however, terribly fun to write. So this is this, If you like it, drop me a review pleasies, and tell me what you thought of it :3 xxx**

Mops, Magic and Mayhem.

Gaius's physician chambers were a mess. This might have been something to do with the four potions and a bucket (of something black, gloopy and foul smelling that he really, really didn't want to know what it contained) that he'd just dropped all over the floor. He'd only been leaning on the self they were balanced on a little bit, while trying to reach some herbs on the one above, when he slipped, and the chair he'd been standing on toppled over backwards, his hands pulling the shelf and its contents down with it.

Oops.

He needed to be taking Arthur his breakfast in less than four minutes. He really, really did not have time to clear it up.

He glanced quickly around.

Nope, no one else here to notice if he was to just...

His eyes glowed a brief gold, and a mop danced its way out of the cupboard, the bucket rolling merrily behind it. He extended his hand casually, letting his eyes flash gold once more, and with a few words, the bucket stood itself up and filled with water. He casually hummed a tune to himself, and set about fixing the shelf back up as the mop dunked itself and set upon the black ooze on the floor.

Even with magic, it was a hard task. The bucket re-filling whenever water was needed and the clean areas of floor quickly drying.

Caught up in his own thoughts, he didn't notice the footsteps. It was a funny, wet, squelchy noise, and a splutter that made Merlin turn around.

Oh no.

Oh, no, no, no...

Prince Arthur was stood there, stunned. The mop, greasy and black from scrubbing at the spillage, was... oh no...

Mopping his face.

_Fhrul Wether! _Merlin cried, attempting to cut off the magic that held the broom in mid-air... even though he was too late... much too late. The mop dropped to the floor, but instead of ceasing its activities, it leapt up and started dancing its way... towards Merlin.

It was an undignified scramble, across Gaius's table and towards the door as the mop... chased him.

"Mer_lin_!" Arthur's voice rang out, loud and disbelieving, as he... gave chase.

Arthur knew! Merlin had to get away; he had to run, now.

Merlin all but bolted down the hall, the broom dancing behind him, as a furious Arthur followed him, with black streaked across his face, yelling profanities and threatening him with the stocks. Merlin began yelling words of magic in the ancient language, his eyes flashing gold, something, anything to get the broom to halt.

With no luck.

Could this get any worse?

It was that moment, as that exact thought crossed his mind, that he tore past Gaius, who lunged for him, and shouted:

"Merlin! I've just been to my chambers! Have you seen the mess in... Oh! I... Is that my mop? Merlin I... Arthur!"

And then Gaius was running, ropes flapping around his ankles, his shouts mingling with Arthur's after him.

Merlin groaned, and kept running, yup, this had just got so, so much worse...

"Merlin!"

Oh no... not her, not now!

"You had magic all this time and never told me!" She cried.

Morgana. It was Morgana... tagging on the end of the line... followed by Gwen, who stared at him open mouthed as he rushed past, then bunched her skirts up in her fist, quickly joining on after her lady.

"Merlin you idiot!"

"Merlin my boy!"

"Merlin!"

Attracted by the shouts, a flurry of guards appeared at the end of the corridor.

"My lady? What seems to be the matt..."

"Sorry!" Merlin yelled over his shoulder as he pushed past them, quickly followed by an entourage of people... and a dancing mop...

"After him!"

And then the guards gave chase. Dashing out the castle and into the courtyard, he could see the knights lined up for practice... and...

"Merlin!"

Lancelot, Percival, Leon, Elyan, Gwaine... and a bunch of other knights gave chase, shouting profanities, and loud exclamations of "AFTER 'IM".

Merlin whimpered quietly to himself... what would his mother say?

"Merlin?" Oh no... What was she doing here? Hunith stood, a cloak she had been about to buy from a merchant in one hand, her mouth agape.

"I can explain!" He yelled as he ran past, followed by the crowd, realising that he really, probably, couldn't...

"Merlin!" Growled Arthur from behind him, and with that, she, and the market traders, and a gaggle of peasants just along for the ride, joined on the end.

He ran along toward the gates of Camelot, where he had to dodge past...

"SORCERY!"

Merlin groaned loudly. The last person he wanted to see...

Uther.

"AFTER HIM!"

And with that, what felt like the entire population of Camelot (and was that a unicorn over there?), after him...

He was out the gates now, dashing away from Camelot, all but screaming words of the ancient language, trying to stop that dam mop, when...

"Young Warlock!"

He froze.

They all froze.

For rising up before them, was the gigantic, golden-scaled form... of the Great Dragon.

"This is not how your destiny should be"

He raised a great, scaled brow, in a terrifying imitation of Gaius, as Merlin muttered something under his breath, which sounded almost like "tell me about it".

The great beast found himself grinning, laughing as the people before him stared in shocked silence. "Oh yes, young warlock, I'll 'tell you about it'..." And he proceeded to rant about coins, kingdoms, and destiny.

What eventually broke him off was Arthur finally finding his wits and drawing his sword, holding it in an iron grip. The dragon all but coughed and looked... sheepish? Though those teeth made the expression a little...

"Young warlock!" The dragon's cry pulled Merlin from his thoughts, and the great beast let out a puff of breath, causing the mop, which had been dutifully mopping at one of the raven-headed boy's ears, to fall to the ground, still. "I suppose I must use my amazing dragon-ey powers to reverse time, remove their memories, and solve this mess of yours!"

Merlin's mouth dropped open.

"wha?" he stammered.

There was a flash of white, startling and pure, and Merlin found himself in Gaius's chambers. The shelf in front of him, standing on the chair.

It took him seven seconds to realise what, when, why, how, where, and then he carefully clambered down.

It wouldn't to do have a repeat of the incident.

It wouldn't do at all.

Grinning to himself, he wandered off towards the kitchen; after all, Arthur would be expecting his breakfast.

He later dismissed the unicorn as having been a horse with a _very_ strange forehead... but he wasn't entirely sure...

End


End file.
